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Do you think the confidence, courage and perseverance are the keys to victory in the negotiations? Then your bargaining skills need to be rebooted. Over the past ten years, the literature on this issue has come to the conclusion that you have to leave your ego at the door of the hall for negotiations. Compromise and kindness are the new rules of negotiation. As this soft approach works? We have compiled a list of rules, with which you could start.
1. Listen before you speak
You always have time to open his mouth. Have patience to find out first what the other side thinks. Then you will have more time to adapt their point of view so that it is consistent with the aims of both parties, says Norm Brodsky. When Mike Beyher came to Brodsky for advice on the negotiations for a loan, Brodsky told him a story with a certain morality: garbage of one is a treasure for another. Or, in his case, the suffering of one person seem a funny joke to another. Therefore, starting any negotiations, do not make any assumptions about what is on the mind of the opposite side. Simply log into their situation with an open mind and many questions.
2. Conquer your fear
The late Bob Woolf, a prominent lawyer of sports show business stars and an author of the book «It Does not Hurt to Ask», said that 95 percent of people with whom you negotiate, are nervous too and, yes, feel fear, just like you. For this reason, he thought, kindness is the key competitive advantage when it comes to negotiations. Do you believes that his theory of the "good guys come first" does not apply at the negotiating table? Well, take a look at his track record. Wolf’s combination of professionalism, ethics and good manners speaks for itself - he has successfully represented Julius Irving, Larry Bird, Charles Yastrzhemski and other stars in contract negotiations.
3. Do not invent
The main thing is that you should be completely truthful talking about his situation, says business veteran Norm Brodsky. This is especially true when it comes to negotiating a loan or other financial mechanisms. You do not want to win some talks at the cost of your reputation. The more you are opened to the other side, the more likely you will get a satisfactory result. "When you are negotiating about money, you should not lie" - says Brodsky. "Just tell the truth."
4. Prepare as for the exam
Remember, the better you have understood the situation before you sit down at the negotiating table, the better for you. In principle, everyone realizes why training is in your interest, but there is one little-known reason, derived from psychological research. And that is "the principle of integrity", which is an inner necessity of man to seem reasonable. This means that your partner is likely to adhere to certain standards and will take into account your opinion, if you can prove that you are absolutely sure of what you say. Possessing information, you can use the arguments of discussion in your favor.
5. Avoid similarities with dogs
Two pitbulls are locked in a room and one will be forced to comply. This mentality is not only outdated, but will not let you achieve anything. In fact, nobody has the right to bare fangs and barking loudly as it may seem, when negotiating. When negotiations are intense, no one ever wants to retreat. Roger Fisher and William Ury in the book «Getting to Yes» suggest that instead of looking at the other side as the enemy, you have to focus on their strengths and seek ways for mutual benefit. The idea is that you need to attack the root problem, not the other negotiators.
6. If you think that all is lost, try to draw out something else
If negotiations do not move and take up too much time and energy, you can give them up. Before you do this, be sure to stop and think: what else my company or I can learn from this situation? Maybe someone else will try to take over the negotiations? Or, perhaps, you can use an unpleasant situation as an opportunity to educate people in your company, how to deal with difficult clients.
7. Remember, you are a pro in negotiations
When it comes to negotiations, you are likely to underestimate the experience. «Getting to Yes» book proves it. "Each of us agrees on something several times a day." Yes, your employees, children, spouse, and even fellow travelers on the train may help you improve your skills every day.
Original by Christine Lagorio-Chafkin, inc.com
1. Listen before you speak
You always have time to open his mouth. Have patience to find out first what the other side thinks. Then you will have more time to adapt their point of view so that it is consistent with the aims of both parties, says Norm Brodsky. When Mike Beyher came to Brodsky for advice on the negotiations for a loan, Brodsky told him a story with a certain morality: garbage of one is a treasure for another. Or, in his case, the suffering of one person seem a funny joke to another. Therefore, starting any negotiations, do not make any assumptions about what is on the mind of the opposite side. Simply log into their situation with an open mind and many questions.
2. Conquer your fear
The late Bob Woolf, a prominent lawyer of sports show business stars and an author of the book «It Does not Hurt to Ask», said that 95 percent of people with whom you negotiate, are nervous too and, yes, feel fear, just like you. For this reason, he thought, kindness is the key competitive advantage when it comes to negotiations. Do you believes that his theory of the "good guys come first" does not apply at the negotiating table? Well, take a look at his track record. Wolf’s combination of professionalism, ethics and good manners speaks for itself - he has successfully represented Julius Irving, Larry Bird, Charles Yastrzhemski and other stars in contract negotiations.
3. Do not invent
The main thing is that you should be completely truthful talking about his situation, says business veteran Norm Brodsky. This is especially true when it comes to negotiating a loan or other financial mechanisms. You do not want to win some talks at the cost of your reputation. The more you are opened to the other side, the more likely you will get a satisfactory result. "When you are negotiating about money, you should not lie" - says Brodsky. "Just tell the truth."
4. Prepare as for the exam
Remember, the better you have understood the situation before you sit down at the negotiating table, the better for you. In principle, everyone realizes why training is in your interest, but there is one little-known reason, derived from psychological research. And that is "the principle of integrity", which is an inner necessity of man to seem reasonable. This means that your partner is likely to adhere to certain standards and will take into account your opinion, if you can prove that you are absolutely sure of what you say. Possessing information, you can use the arguments of discussion in your favor.
5. Avoid similarities with dogs
Two pitbulls are locked in a room and one will be forced to comply. This mentality is not only outdated, but will not let you achieve anything. In fact, nobody has the right to bare fangs and barking loudly as it may seem, when negotiating. When negotiations are intense, no one ever wants to retreat. Roger Fisher and William Ury in the book «Getting to Yes» suggest that instead of looking at the other side as the enemy, you have to focus on their strengths and seek ways for mutual benefit. The idea is that you need to attack the root problem, not the other negotiators.
6. If you think that all is lost, try to draw out something else
If negotiations do not move and take up too much time and energy, you can give them up. Before you do this, be sure to stop and think: what else my company or I can learn from this situation? Maybe someone else will try to take over the negotiations? Or, perhaps, you can use an unpleasant situation as an opportunity to educate people in your company, how to deal with difficult clients.
7. Remember, you are a pro in negotiations
When it comes to negotiations, you are likely to underestimate the experience. «Getting to Yes» book proves it. "Each of us agrees on something several times a day." Yes, your employees, children, spouse, and even fellow travelers on the train may help you improve your skills every day.
Original by Christine Lagorio-Chafkin, inc.com